I have had problems with my cycles for many years, irregular cycles, flooding and painful. I cannot count how may times I have flooded onto clothes, chairs at work and thought it was the norm. I had a laparoscopy in 1993 and was told it was IBS.

Five years ago I was diagnosed with PCOS and basically told to go away, lose weight and go back for Clomid if wanted children.

Last year I had the worst pain I have ever experienced - my GP felt it was either endo or adhesions and referred me to a gynae. I saw the Gynae and went in for a laparoscopy in October 2007. I woke up being told that the lap failed as they thought they had punctured something and I was being kept in as precaution. I had 2 ultrasounds and was told that unless I wanted children, I could not be kept on the gynae books. I had HSG and was told there was nothing wrong. I kept saying that the symptoms were getting worse but they did not listen.

Finally after my sister-in-law and family seeing my deterioration and opinion of GP at BUPA healthcheck, I went to see Andrew Pickersgill at Alexandra in Cheadle. I was diagnosed with endo, adhesions and fibroids via laparoscopy and MRI. I had excision and a myomectomy last week. He has been great did not push me into a hysterectomy as he wants to give me time to recover and wait 6 months, then see how I am.

My only concern is I may lose my BUPA as displaced at work and worried if I can continue to see him via the NHS as he is in a trust 20 miles away.

Update June 2008
I felt OK after my operation and went back to work to more crap from them and had a horrible cycle, I was warned it would not be ok the first time. However, I still had pains after it ended. I saw my GP and they think I have an infection, do various tests and give me two horrible antibiotics that I tell them I have problems taking. I then ring my consultant as I am not happy and he says if I feel no better in 48 hours, call me. I end up going to see him and he does an ultrasound, thankfully I’m OK, he changes my antibiotics as he does think I have had an infection and takes bloods to see what has been going on. I’m waiting for these results now. Thankfully I’m feeling better but a little sick from the tablets, I’m just hoping my results are OK.

Update July 2008
Got my results back in June and they think I had an infection. I felt fine after taking antibiotics but then a week later I got a really nasty UTI. I'm now having my second cycle since the operation, really bad back pain and stomach pain, I feel like all this has not been worth it.

I'm still having major hassles at work and think I may have no choice but to start looking outside, but I am worried with the time I have had off in last year that no-one will touch me.

Update August 2008
I have got a new job - and they have not queried the amount of time I have had off as most of it is due to operations. They are also giving me top of the range health cover. I am so relieved.

I am definitely feeling the benefits of my recent excision/fibroid removal my last two cycles have been so much lighter can now use "normal" towels rather than night ones all the time. Only thing I am still getting is bad back ache a few days before and sickly feeling - having my check-up in October so am going to mention this if it doesn't improve.

Update December 2008
Started my new role in September and it has flown by. Had my follow-up with Mr P in September and he was pleased with my progress.

Decided to start TTC. However last month had a burst ovarian cyst and had to see Mr Pickersgill again. Have halted my weekly acupuncture for a while as I feel this may have contributed. I am now about to try Clomid in the hope this will help.

Update February 2009
I started the Clomid in late December. At the end of January, I started to have pregnancy symptoms; sickness and my breasts became enlarged and veiny. My stomach was hard so I did a test and it came back positive. Sadly just 24 hours after the test I started bleeding. I went to the GP, who was useless, just said early miscarriage and asked me to have a blood test.

Two days later the bleeding had become worse, my GP called to say no pregnancy. However after the bleeding stopped I had awful pain. I saw a different GP who examined me and was not happy and so sent me to Rochdale Infirmary. The SHO saw me and she said the pain was nothing to do with the miscarriage, it’s either reoccurrence of my endo/fibroids or PID. She refused to give me an ultrasound scan unless I am admitted.

Thankfully my OH called Mr Pickersgill, my private Gynae, who said to discharge myself and go and see him. I saw him 24 hours later, he scanned me and feels that the pain is due to scar tissues from my fibroid removal as anything implanting then coming away will irritate this. We had a long discussion about my future care TTC, as a blood test my GP had done two weeks before the miscarriage showed I did not have enough progesterone to support a pregnancy. Mr P agrees to deal with everything from now on. It will cost but I can’t put a price on having a family.

Update May 2009
I had a month off after my miscarriage and started 100mg of Clomid, all was fine, my tracking scan was great and my consultant was really happy. However a week after, I began to vomit and have nausea all day, headaches, extreme tiredness and I felt really out of sorts, I also had really strong pains. I felt at first I may be pregnant but then AF started. After my cycle finished I still didn't feel right and ended up in hospital for two days with a water infection caused by the massive drop in my hormones. I was told not take anything else until my follow-up.

Mr Pickersgill has briefly mentioned Tamoxifen/Letrozole and possible ovarian drilling (puncture of 4-10 small follicles with electrocautery) although I may have to pay for this.

I am so confused about what to do next; I need to sit down and have a serious chat. Although I am feeling physically better, mentally I feel crap. Work is pants as I am surrounded by pregnant colleagues, all I hear is baby talk. Friends and family are trying to help but they are coming out with stuff I really don't want to hear. Also so many success stories on here that I know I shouldn't resent, but I do.

I really hope I feel better after my appointment and I know what is next for me.

Update July 2009
I had a further two suspected water infections since end of May and although one came back with e coli my pains have worsened and Mr Pickersgill my Gynae referred me to a urologist as he suspected it could be interstitial cystitis. Saw the urologist who examined me, tested more urine which was negative and said I feel this is all due to endo playing tricks. I am now going back to my Gynae my pain is getting worse and going to loo is a nightmare.

I feel the endo has come back I am getting grief at work; they just don't seem to grasp what we go through. I am seriously thinking if I am facing having more surgery, which has again no guarantees, maybe I'll be better off with a hysterectomy and then at least I can move on.

Really don't know what to do.

Update August 2009
Went to see my Gynae Mr P who felt my only option was another lap. Unfortunately my insurers started being awkward asking for my medical records and saying that even though I had paid for me tracking scans whilst on Clomid they deemed I had had treatment for fertility under my policy and threatened to cancel it! Fortunately my Gynae agreed put me on his NHS list and when I rang to check the wait time, I was told at least 4 months.

We then decided to pay but when Mr P heard this he said he wasn't prepared to let me do this and I had my op in two weeks which is amazing. I can't thank him enough. He found more endo near my bladder, and back of womb, surgery on left ovary and ovarian drilling on right ovary. Have had a pesky infection my belly button wound but that is now getting better.

I'm now just looking to a pain free future and hopefully to be blessed with a child as this is probably now my best chance.

Update June 2011
Since I last posted two years ago so much has happened. Shortly after my surgery in July 2009 I got pregnant again but started to show signs of losing and had to have an ERPC. I suffered a huge bleed after the surgery and was flattened for months. I ended up having a hysteroscopy as they thought I might have Asherman's syndrome.

I then tried Loestrin pill for a few months but my pain came back and I ended up having to take a course of Zoladex which then gave me high blood pressure problems. A scan showed just before this that I probably had severe adenomyosis.

After coming off the Zoladex I tried for another pregnancy but lost this one too. I had more surgery of ovarian cysts in November 2010 and then after more months of pain had a hysterectomy in March 2011 leaving my ovaries due to the blood pressure problems.

As of today I am pain free but am now showing very strong signs of menopause so am being investigated. I never imagined at 40 I would be facing this. My career is in tatters because of my health, I have no children and feel rubbish.

The advice I would give to others is don't be fobbed off get yourself to an endo specialist, have your children early and if necessary get to a miscarriage specialist. I would do things very differently if I could do.

Update December 2011
Left my old job on severance in Sept 2011 best decision I ever made. Started working for a major bank again working for a Director who has been fab with me. Her sisterin law has endo so she knows what effect it has on you. Unfortunately I'm having to have another op as I'm having trouble with left ovary and gynae thinks I may have some endo back plus adhesions.

I really hope this is my last op.

Update January 2012
Had my op in December and I was fine for a few weeks then I started to have major menopause symptoms. The blood tests came back that my remaining ovary had failed so I am now on HRT as I could hardly walk due to the joint pain nor sleep due to the severity of my flushes. Not the outcome I was expecting. And before anyone says HRT can bring the endo back I am willing to take the risk as I don't really want to feel like an old woman at 40 after all the crap I have already had. I want to be able to enjoy my life and the 3.5 week trip to Canada I have booked in June and do things like a normal woman can.

Def coming back as a man next time they get a much better deal..

Update April 2012
Have been on hrt for several months first patches then implant. The implant is taking some time to kick in the anxiety attacks are awful. I have also been suffering with vaginal atrophy which is horrid. Really need to feel better before my hols

Update May 2012
Kept having what I thought were just panic attacks and went for a check-up with my Gynae. He asked me to see my cardiologist as he felt something was wrong. They now think I have tachycardia which can be hormone related and stress related. Have been hooked up to a monitor for 3 days so they can check me and sort treatment. Just praying I’ll be ok to go to Canada in 2 weeks’ time

Update August 2012
My palpitations completely stopped. My trip to Canada was amazing and I am going back next year. My HRT is not settled. I am now trying testosterone too as my last blood profile showed my level was low. I have to give this a few months and see my consultant again. I feel like I am being a nuisance at times but I cant face ten years of this until normal meno age.

Update January 2013
I have ended up having weekly blood tests to see what is going on and my consultant now thinks I have resistant ovary syndrome which is similar to premature ovarian failure. If when my implant wears off my levels are OK, he wants to me withdraw from HRT; that's fine for him to say but symptoms like vaginal dryness, flushing night sweats are not fun. He has then said to me that if my remaining ovary has not completely failed I will go through another menopause when it completely fails; deep joy.

I am contemplating going to see the top meno guy in London who has a 4 month waiting list and is will cost me in the region fo £700 but I feel I have no choice. If men went through this they would take it seriously!

Re: Beaglelady Story
Basically I put my foot down with my gynae and GP. I have been given oestrogel to top me up plus vagifem to sort vaginal/bladder issues and now am feeling more human again.

There seems to be a lack of understanding of surgical menopause.